Right now, the Cubs game is starting on the radio in a minute, a perfect breeze is blowing the curtains back and forth, the sky is a deep gorgeous blue, and I hear the occasional reaction fromneighbors watching the Bears game. It’s a perfect day.
Except I’m literally flat on my back, and the kids are apparently driving Xife nuts. He’s stuck with them while I split my time between playing on my Droid while laying down, desperately trying to catch up on homework, sleeping, and trying to move around enough to avoid losing strength.
Why? Herniated discs. Two of them, one small and one “huge.” Fun stuff. Sitting hurts. Walking hurts. Doing anything other than laying down hurts. I had a cortisone injection this past Wednesday. It took the pain down from excruitiating to doable. It feels like it’s wearing off already.
I feel utterly useless. I went from wondering if I’d get back to hockey this season to wondering how I’ll manage to take good care of the kids during the week and get caught up with my class. I’m a week behind in a class that lasts 5.5 weeks.
I feel pretty low right now. Family is too far away to help, and my friends have their own responsibilities. I need to be able to work at the computer. Money is getting tighter, and I’m a money sink. Like a ramshackle house.
So, it’s a perfect day. And all I’m doing is wallowing. But hey, at least I’m not dead!